I think that all of us, or almost all of us, have faked an orgasm at some point in our lives.

And the reason is common: having sex, only with penetration, most of us find it difficult to achieve that pleasure promised by so many books and movies.

Because in those scenes in the movies or series, also according to the songs or the risqué chapters of any novel, it was enough to put it in .

So, when in doubt about not knowing exactly what was happening with our pleasure, we resorted to interpretive skills .

We let out some Oscar-worthy groan to make it seem like, yes, we had just as much fun as he did.

And that’s how the orgasmic gap came into our lives. A separation in the climax counter that gave rise to all that series of myths that circulate around us.

It’s like it’s harder for us to get there or that, from a biological point of view, we are more complex than men when it comes to enjoying ourselves.

It doesn’t cost us more nor is our system more difficult, it’s just that, during all this time, the measuring stick has always been intercourse .

And of course, when 100% of men reach orgasm with it, but we don’t, it is considered to be the practice that can be used as an infallible pleasure calculation tool .

But, what if oral sex had been used as a practice to compare the ease of coming between the two?

The problem is that, starting from intercourse as the unit of measurement, if women don’t arrive, they immediately think that their sexuality is not right, something strange is happening with them.

In no case is the practice questioned . And the worst thing is that even we ourselves believe it because since we were little we take penetration as a reference.

So what can we do to counter it?

Saving distances

The first thing is to become the owner of your sensations , which you can achieve if you discover how to have a good time, how to speed up and how to ‘nonsense’.

Secondly, penetration is fine – you won’t read me saying otherwise – because it is pleasurable, yes, and it also allows you to connect on other levels, but don’t make it the center of your sexual life (coitocentrism).

Let it be one more stop on the way to enjoyment, but not to reaching the climax if you notice that you lack stimulation in other areas.

Finally, always communicate with your partner.

We can’t hold the rest of us responsible for our lack of orgasms if we don’t even bother to say what’s happening to us.

If you see that you don’t arrive , ask for that little mouth. Explain to him how you can do it, and if he doesn’t do it the way you’d like, show him .

The orgasmic gap is not going to repair itself like the ozone layer. You have to reduce it by cumming (or making them cum).